I've been better: toof if-use

So there I am, minding my own business, doing what I'm told is ones of the most important things for my overall health, and BLAM! My tooth falls out! 

Now before we get to far you should know oral hygiene was not really something that was instilled in me as a child... In fact, personal hygiene in general was rather sparse for me as a child.  My sister in law can still remember while we were in line at magic mountain and I was scathing at my neck complaining of being itchy, then bragging that it had been two weeks without a bath... But this story is about teeth. 

Growing up we would spend our summers in McCall Idaho, then a small sleepy little mountain paradise, now a more popular mountain paradise.  It was here where we were transported back in time for about 3mos and did just about nothing modern. This is also where we would see the town dentist who was also the mayor.  He had one of these old school dentist chairs with pulley arm driven drill.  If you didn't cooperate he wouldn't use Novocaine, if you did you got a shined dime at the end of your visit. 

Well once a year visits to the dentist isn't all that bad... The problem comes when you stop visiting the town with you're dentist and no one thinks about getting a new one. So fast forward to high school, maybe 4yrs after the last time at the dentist and you're sitting down to breakfast.  A big bowl of generic brand corn flakes with granulated sugar sprinkled on (because just buying frosted flakes was unhealthy). You take a bite and something feels different.  You tounge your back tooth to feel something that must be stuck to the back. Maybe one of the corn flakes was somehow stuck to your teeth and was poking your tounge... Then you realize it's your tooth.  Your tooth is some how poking your tounge. Then you realize your tooth has cracked open and the hollowed out cavernous canyon edge is poking you. 

I remember that next trip to the dentist. Everything was shiny and new, almost space aged! They had a TV in the ceiling you could watch cable while having work done! That wasn't the reason I remember those dentist visits... And it wasn't that I spent days in his chair during the subsequent trips, it was the first time I had seen that kind of look on someone's face caused by me. 

The dentist peered into my mouth as everything seemed to start out normal. Then he looked up at my eyes, then to his assistant, then back in my mouth, then he excused himself to go "talk" to my mother. I can only imagine the thoughts that went through his mind, neglect, abuse, astonishment, anger... I remember because that's what his face portrayed to me. I don't remember being in pain, and I don't remember much detail, just that I spent many hours in that chair watching music videos in VH1 and MTV, Whilst this dentist worked on my teeth in blocks. 

So now it's 20yrs later, I've been taking care of my own teeth for a while now, and one of the best dentists in the world now "owns" my mouth! Anything that needed to be redone had been redone and things are great!  The last few cleanings had gone so well I didn't even get there usual "you should floss more".  So while I'm at home, getting ready for bed, got an early morning but I deceased to stay up a little later watching a movie with the wife. Finally getting to my oral hygiene routine when "pop... Clank" my crown just feel off! 

Mind you, by this time the back four teeth on each side have been crowned and some even root canaled. What the what?!? There was no pain so I thought maybe it just fell off... Then there was pain. Not one of these root canal teeth. Maybe it just had bad cement... For the past few years... Well I'll just take a look:

Crown seems okay, a little corrosion or decay maybe... Looks like rust. Well let's take a look at this tooth: 

What the... I know I have a dental mirror around her somewhere:

Oh Frosted Flakes that doesn't look good. 

I make the appointment for the dentist, who recently broker his hand snowboarding, and see his colleague.  I begin with letting him know that anything that ends in there word "implant" will be a little upsetting.  He takes one quick look and chooses his words carefully.  I guessed it... Implant.

As he explained, Dental implants can take about 9mos from start to finish, think of it like having a baby he says.  Oh kill me now...

The oral surgeon is super nice and has been doing this for years.  The tooth cracks into there prices: 

He tells me all about the cadaver bone they will be using as bone graft to build up my jaw to accept the implant in another few months. Sounds good. Then he tells me to get some rest and to not blow my nose or snort for a few weeks... Say what? 

When I got my wisdoms teeth out the focus was on no straws so you didn't make a dry socket. But if your tooth roots are long enough on the uppers they will grow into your sinuses... What the?!?! So if I blow my nose or snort or really even sneeze hard I'm gonna perforated my sinus and blow out a bunch of dead person bone shards into my mouth!!! How did I get so lucky?!?

But the good news is it seens like it's healing normally... Save for the massive headache and general feeling of wishing I was dead: 

Now off for my antibiotics, analgesics, decongestant, and baby food.